How we begin the morning can set the direction for the rest of the day. Repeating a simple daily ritual creates stability, interrupts old autopilot patterns, and makes it easier to meet life’s changes with steadiness. The smallest practices can help reset your nervous system, guiding the day in a calmer, more grounded direction.

With CPTSD, your body may wake in a stress state or your mind may slip into trauma loops. Taking a few minutes for a grounding ritual can calm the nervous system and begin to rebuild a sense of safety.

Interrupting the trauma loop over time helps reset your nervous system and build new patterns of safety. A grounding ritual helps bring you back to the present, creating a steady anchor at the beginning of the day. You will be building a steady anchor at the beginning of the day to build self-trust and remind yourself that you have choice in how you respond.

This is how you begin to feel this in you. Over time you internalize these habits. Though they start off with just practice and thought, repeating them over and over, is how it becomes part of you. Along with other practices, you’ll learn that you matter, you are resilient (you’re showing this right now) and that you have choice. 

I used to practice this ritual below three times a day, sometimes two. Now I mostly focus on the morning or when I need it.

This is not about perfection and it is about doing your best when you can. I have let a day here and there pass by. It’s ok. Do not set yourself goals that seem so big you end up defeating yourself before you get to them. Do your best to be consistent as much as you can but not perfect.

Sometimes, we let a goal or new habit get so big in our heads that we don’t follow through.

The more you do it the easier it becomes and gains momentum. Once you start you’ll find that sometimes you do have that extra minute to add something else in, like 5 slow breaths or arm movements.

Here is an example of my own gentle morning ritual that I’ve used to start to reset my nervous system during my CPTSD healing journey.

It seems long so if you need to pick and choose, please do so. For a cheat sheet click here. While it seems like a lot, in practice the morning is quite quick.

Morning Routine

1. Stay away from screens. First thing early in the morning, not even for the time. This is not about the “evils” of technology. It’s about starting the day with precious time for yourself. It’s about choosing what you let in and what you let influence you. You are consciously making a decision and setting a tone for your day.

This precious time is for you. Get a nightstand clock if you need to. 

We are so overly stimulated today by so many things we don’t even realize it: phones, tv, computers, the radio, even light at night… Yes I know these can also be beneficial but just a minute of calm and being with yourself is important too.  

When you are healing from CPTSD, but in general as well, what you expose yourself to, whether it’s the news, social media, or other people, can have a significant impact on your wellbeing. It can either be uplifting or neutral but it can also be very negative and lead you into doomscrolling or thinking things are worse than they are. You then end up focusing on that and the status quo stays the same.

You are trying to shift your mindset here, so choose the direction you want to go and how you want to be.

2. Set an intent for the day.
This can be verbal (even if just in your head) such as: “I am at peace in this moment,” “I am ok”, “It’s all good.” Whatever works for you and keep it simple. If you need some help and encounter resistance, not that you will either, it’s okay and part of Complex PTSD as well.

This can be non-verbal as well. For example, notice a calm spot on your body. If there is a part that is ailing, pretend that part of you can breathe. Engage in a soft smile…

3. Take a slow deep breath with a slower exhale. You can put your hand to your chest if that feels more grounding to you.

4. Look at natural light and nature. Breathe in the outdoor air if you can. Open a window, go outside if possible. Look at the sky and just take it in, regardless of whether it’s blue, raining, cloudy…. Are there birds, trees, what are you noticing. Notice anything in nature.

You are checking in with yourself. Re-establishing safety and comfort. Setting the tone for the rest of the day. 

5. Drink some water. Yes before coffee or tea. Hydrate your body. Have your coffee and breakfast after water.

6. Stay Open Just a Bit. Be open to the possibility that healing is possible (and maybe even already happening,) even if you can’t feel it yet. If staying open feels stressful, then soften it. Stay open 1% or 1% of 1%, or simply let the idea rest quietly in the background. You don’t need to focus on it. Just let it simmer.

If you have to pick between midday and night, choose night.

7. Mid Day: Especially in the beginning of your healing. You want to try and a few minutes to check in with yourself at some point during the day. Again, it can be a simple wording, putting your bare feet on the ground, looking outside and saying something to yourself. Eventually, you’ll need to check-in less often.

8. Nighttime. Similar to the morning, nighttime is a time to close off the day before sleep in the same way you started it, and for the same purposes. Here you’ll want to add this:

Add gratitude at night. Find gratitude for one single thing and it can be anything.

At night, simply take stock of your day. You will gently say good night to yourself and or the world outside your window. If needed, you can repeat a grounding exercises such as feet on the floor.

Find gratitude for anything: that you are breathing, that you had less flashbacks, that you have a bed, as simple or complex as you want it to be.  If you want, let the gratitude grow.

If you feel like you can’t: for instance: you feel you are having a lot of flashbacks and these suggestions trigger you. Please remember this is the CPTSD talking and is there to “protect” you because it doesn’t believe healing is possible, and you have been through something difficult.

Accept it and gently try to move forward if you can and find something that you can find gratitude for.

Is there anything else you can think of that would help you feel grounded?

Remember: Try to find the “can” not the “can’t” 

Some thoughts that might come up: “I don’t have time for all of this”. “I have to get ready”, “I feel too bad,” “I have to take the kids to school prepare the lunch” etc. 

When life gets busy, it’s easy to forget ourselves. But these few minutes you give yourself each day are how you reset your nervous system and begin to rebuild a sense of safety from the inside out.

Instead of leading with why and what you “can’t” do, try finding what it is that you can do. For example, waking up without the phone, taking a breath, and looking at natural daylight, can take just a few minutes. 

Take any small thing and make it consistent. Remember that you are doing something.

Start Small: It’s about creating a small routine to help you establish a new ritual. Can you just look outside. Can you try taking a breath while lying down. If you forgot in the morning, totally ok – can you take a minute later, at anytime during the day…

These exercises are short and shouldn’t take too long.

However, part of any change is putting new practices in place and making them a priority. I think sometimes we tell ourselves things like: “When I have more time, then I will….” But sometimes we have to make time.

There will always be curveballs, things will change. The best strategy I’ve found, is to learn to be flexible and respond instead of trying to control every little thing in my outside environment.

Stay gentle with yourself and go at your own pace.

Warmly,
Allie C. | CalmFire™